I wanted to wish all my readers a Happy Chinese New Year. This year is the year of the pig and it's time to collect!! Chinese New Year's has always been this funny tradition that i've always tried to understand growing up in the america's. I've learned a few things over the years and i'm happy to share them with you. Just stay away from me when i get married!
First and foremost..you have to respect the tradition. Chinese New Year is about fortune and prosperity so you'll have to follow a few guidelines first.
Wear red when going to dim sum, dinner, and/or some weird orange eating ceremony.
Why do you need to wear red? Red symbolizes good luck and you don't have to listen to your parents nag at you. Just stay away from any calgary flames jerseys, red shirts with skulls or devils on them, and if you don't wanna suffer from bad pictures...put the sanrio stuff away. (unless you are 10 years or younger)
Clean the whole house BEFORE Chinese New Year.
Why clean the house? firstly, your parents will see that you are actually doing something productive. Secondly, you can't clean your house on Chinese New Year because it brings bad luck for the rest of the year! It's believed that cleaning the house sweeps away the badluck and makes the home ready for good luck.
Brooms are BAD!!!
Do NOT bring the brooms out on Chinese New Year. You'll sweep away the fortune.
Showering and/or bathing is BAD!!
Why is that bad? Apparently, you'll wash away the good luck for the rest of the year. Plus, hair in cantonese is "faht" which is a homonym for "get rich" so if you wash your hair...you just washed away your wealth for the year. It's a bit gross...but f*ck it...i can do a couple days without showering...i'm not gonna screw around with my lucky money.
Do NOT CUT YOUR HAIR
The same reason as above. why would you want to jeopardize you year?
Know your new year sayings.
This is one of the most important things you should know. If you don't know chinese for shit...then just memorize the following...you'll just seem smarter to the rest of your asian family..who knows...they might slip in an extra 5 or 10 bucks. That's lunch man!
Gong hay fat choi
Sun Leen Fai Lok
Bo Bo Go Sing
Chut yup ping ohn
Sun Leen Dai Gut
Say Gwai Ping ohn
Leen Leen Yau Yu
Mahn See Yu Yee
AND THE MOST IMPORTANT ONE OF ALL. "LAI SEE DOW LOY" or if you speak mandarin you can say "hóngbāo nálái"
you can help me add more. I'm a jooksing...i'm limited to these ones. haha
Target the married couples.
Offer to drive them to the party. Call them on their phone. Just get them to come out to the party because once a couple ties the knot...it's no hold barred...they can't hide anymore. They now have to give you the red packets. If you are nice, you can go easy on them...otherwise...lai see dow loy!
Party with the elders
You have to respect your elders and this is a perfect time to do that. Have some fun with your family. You don't wanna sing karaoke at home...but just do it..have some fun. Drink if you want to...maybe it will get you in the mood. just be content with rice wine.
Do not refuse food
You may not know what the hell you are looking at but it doesn't matter. Eat up. It's a rude thing to not eat the food at the table. Plus, relatives that see this might give you a dollar rather than the 10 dollars.
Try to stay young as long as possible.
If your family is like mine...as you get older...your red packet amount of money gets smaller. Try to stay young and act happy. Talk about your good grades or how you are starting up your own business. It will only help you get the most out of your new years.
Count your lucky money in private.
Don't hold it up to the light. Don't open up the package in front of everybody. These things are disrespectful and you need to show face.
Doing these things should help you maximize your lucky money opportunity.
From one Jooksing to another...
Gong Hay Fat Choy.